So I'm looking for your guys' take on my situation. I've beenhanging out with this guy for about 4 months now. We've been taking it very slow. We would casually hang out for the first 2-3 months. It took him 3 months before he even kissed me. Ever since (for the past month or so) we hang out all the time, have gone on several weekend trips together, he comes with me to stuff like get togethers with my friends, cuddle, kiss and all that. He gets along really well with my friends and I have a great time when I'm with him. The problem is... we work together. We are actually in the same department. We've discussed how nervous we are about the whole situation, knowing that if things go bad, we still have to see eachother at work all day. Quitting to be together isn't really an option, nor practical. So we decided it would be best to take it slow. But I'm starting to get upset because we act like a couple, but don't have a title. I've asked him if he sees this going anywhere and he says yes eventually. I was fine with just dating up until recently. I'm not sure if its because my friends keep giving me crap about it, or if I just feel like naturally we should be progressing into more than just "friends" by now. I know that he doesn't have a lot of dating experience. Sounds like he dated a couple girls in high school but didnt date anyone through college. I'm the complete opposite and have had steady boyfriends since I was 16. I'm almost starting to feel like he's embarrassed of me. I don't know. At what point do you give up and accept the fact that he's not going to commit?

Have you talked to him about committing? I hate to throw a title out there, since I'm a HUGE proponent and supporter of the LGBT community, but it sounds like he may be gay. Every girl I know who dates a guy who loves to hang out, but doesn't want to get physical after months, finds out years later that the guy came out of the closet. I'm not saying that's definitely true, but I talk to lots of women every day and I have heard this story before.

I think it's time to have "the conversation." You've been patient long enough and you won't look like a crazy person for bringing it up. Don't ask him to be your boyfriend (because you haven't slept together), but DO tell him how you feel! Tell him that you feel like he is embarrassed by you & you are very confused. Don't lay down the gauntlet (rookie mistake), but try to have a meaningful conversation with him. Relationships never go anywhere good when communication is poor. This is one thing I have learned the hard way. If he's open to speaking about the situation, then he's a good person to get to know. If he clams up & gets vague, then trust me, your relationship won't be going anywhere anytime soon.

I hope this helped. I am so sorry I couldn't get to this before. I rely on everyone on this site to comment on eachother's forum posts. You always contribute, so I am sad to see you had to wait a few days for a response.  :(

MJ

Thanks for the response! It had been bugging me for a while and I think he could sense it so we sat down and talked about it. He was actually surprised because he figured we were exclusive already anyways! So I told him that a title meant something to me and luckily everything went well and we are now officially together :)

btw YIKES! the gay thing never crossed my mind! I'll have to watch more closely!