You should not have to walk on eggshells. Either he's in 100%, or forget it. Either he's working on the relationship, or he's not. You cannot make someone love you. It hurts when someone stops loving you, but you still love that person. It's a sinking feeling. A no-win situation. However, you can turn it around. The only way to make him notice YOU is to make your life better. You're in nursing school. Focus on that. What else do you like to do? Sometimes when we are depressed and feeling alone-we focus on our ex to make things better. This never works. I'm here for you if you'd like to chat.

Bad relationships are always the same. They start with a spark, followed by hormones...some fun stuff occurs...then a fight...then they end in a flame. If you let the embers burn out, then you're safe and you can possibly work on yourself & then start a GOOD relationship with someone else (once you're healthy & over the last relationship). But if you don't let the embers burn out, they'll just reignite and the same thing will happen again.

You don't wanna beg for him? Then DON'T. You may be young, but I think you're smart enough to see that this relationship isn't going anywhere toward healthy anytime soon. Sounds like it was filled with a lot of hurt, a lot of crying & a lot of surprises...and inbetween there were some good times (probably good sex), but not enough to justify the hurt that has been caused.

So he was your first love. So what? Everyone has to have a first love. A first love means that a SECOND love is in the future. And it sounds like you would do well to move on from this one...this hurtful, rollercoaster of a love that has given you no legs to stand on.

You can't spend your life walking on eggshells. One minor fight shouldn't break the entire relationship. It's not a good way to live & it's not emotionally healthy to always have to wonder about what you "should have done differently."

So, I suggest you get The Breakup Workbook & look at your relationship from a different perspective. Then I suggest you follow all of the steps so you can figure out how to move forward in a HEALTHY way & you don't enter your next relationship already walking on eggshells.

As for "making him" find his way back to you - that's not going to happen. He'll either find his way on his own, or he won't. Nothing you say or do will force him to be with you. If he doesn't think it's a good situation for him, then he doesn't HAVE to be in the situation. Everyone has the right to leave - even you - and that's a good thing to remember as you go through your life. Just because someone says they love you, doesn't mean they will love you forever, or that they even have to love you forever. People fall in and out of love all the time. It hurts, but it happens to everyone.

So think hard about what you want your future to be like. And PLEASE post on someone else's topic on this board, as I believe that will also help you gain perspective about your situation. Keep us updated.

Take care.