Today I am angry, yesterday I felt sorrow...tomorrow I will be ....something

My Boyfriend and I are not broken up completely...though it seems to be heading in that direction. He Broke up with me a week ago, but now wants to "Think things through.." And I go along with it, because I am sooo desperate to keep him. We have had a long distance realationship for a year, been dating for two and known each other for four years. It's not an ideal situation, and it has been a strain on us, but I truly felt that he was worth it.

Now it's a waiting game, and I feel like he holds all the cards. He comes up with ridiculous reasons why my moving to where he is would be hard, cause he has a cat and I'm allergic....The reason he broke things off before was because he couldn't do long distance, and now it all rests on what is going to happen with the cat. I told him I would take meds, that we can figure something out..but he is so hung up on this. I have to move my life, and leave my family and friends to be with him, but it all comes down to his cat. Which...dont get me wrong, I love animals I really do. I can see why he is worried, but I dont think its a reason to break things off. I can't help but fee there is something he isn't telling me. It hurts that the level of trust we had as a couple is gone.

Part of me just wants to end things now, and try to let him go, move on. The other part wants to hold on to him and try to work this out. I really can't imagine loosing him, but I can't keep going on like this not knowing where things stand with us, its breaking me and making me start to resent everything I loved about him and me together.